Crazy Georgia pt.9

Image result for sexy georgia women

Edog: “Impressive.”

Me: “Shut up, I’m busy.”

Edog: “No, you… You are impressive.”

Me: “Oh… Yea, yea… I am.”

Edog: “I had a bet with the balls that tonight you would…”

Me: “Shut up!!!”

We had bar hopped to a Chinese karaoke club down the road and ordered a bottle of Jack, alongside 12 bottles of Corona for the rest of the group. My buzz was proper and I didn’t have much to contribute to the tears shed and booze riddled arguments that transpired among the group of people that followed us here. Within half an hour all of the guys departed outside to puke their brains out, and some of which ended their night with shit stains in their pants.

I sat there sipping my jack with two people sitting across from me. Guess who? Yup.. The Hot chick with the Limp wrist boyfriend and Crazy Georgia. This was a real predicament…

#1: The hot chick with the Limp wrist boyfriend: Her boyfriend abandoned her at the bar, and I barely got a test drive earlier that night. It would be a sure thing if I could get her back to my apartment, which was a 5 minute walk from the bar.

#2: Crazy Georgia: She’s been attached to my hip all night, and she wouldn’t have ditched her friends to chill with me this late if she didn’t have something in mind.

Hmmmm, one more drink…


Crazy Georgia pt.8

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Crazy Georgia: “Hi, nice to meet you.” (staring deeply into my eyes)

Me: “Yea…”

Hungarian Asshole: “Yo… Dickhead.. Over here!”

Crazy Georgia: “Those are your friends?”

Me: “Unfortunately.”

Crazy Georgia: “Hehe.” 

Me: “Do you want to join for a drink?”

Crazy Georgia: “Yes!”

Her eyes got so wide and had a  twinkle in them every time she looked into mine (a twinkle I’ll never forget), I couldn’t tell if she was drunk or in love at first sight. I posted up at the table with overly friendly acquaintances for the most part, and a few friends. She posted up next to me, and was so engaged in everything I commented on. The second my mouth opened she would completely abandon whatever small talk conversation she was engaged in and direct all of her focus on me.

To side track here, she was a hottie… A tight petite feminine body, long brown hair all the way down to her booty, big brown eyes, soft olive skin, docile, cute and nurturing.

As the conversation in our group took a political turn, she stood behind all of my commentary and statements. Fuck it, she fought battles for me and I barely knew the chick. To this day I don’t know if she was seduced by me or was trying to seduce me. I was going to slam her like I just got out of prison irregardless.

Crazy Georgia pt. 7


In the elevator back to shares:

Edog: “Don’t disappoint me.”

Me: You’re a real asshole, you know?”

Edog: “Who’s been there for you through all your rough patches?”

Me: “Me, myself.”

Edog: “Wrong, me. I’ve taken all of your abuse through the rough times… COCKSUCKER!!!”

Me: “We’re here, fuck off now.”

Edog: “Promise you won’t disappoint me.”

Me: “Fuck! If shit doesn’t happen tonight, I’ll buy a fishing rod tomorrow and go pick up some fat chicks to massage you. I’ll use big mac’s as my bait. How bout that?”

Edog: “I’m sorry, I’m making you frustrated. Relax…..”

Me: “Ok.”

Edog: “Don’t disappoint me.”



Crazy Georgia pt.6


I reached into my pocket and pulled out my shitty knock off android.

1 Unread Message – Hungarian Asshole

Hungarian Asshole (audio): “Bro… Where are you?”

Me (audio): “I’m at home, jacking off. Uhhh…”

Hungarian Asshole (audio): “I figured that much. Why you go home?”

Me (audio): “I had to take a serious shit. It’s sitting in a bag by my door, do you want to see?” (I’m not that vile, I used the rooftop)

Hungarian Asshole (audio): “Your funny, I get it… Come back, there’s some hotties here.”

Me (audio): “Oh yea?”

Hungarian Asshole (audio): “I’m buying you a beer now.”

Me (audio): “Go take care of business.”

Hungarian Asshole (audio): “I got a thing with Ania tonight. Your beer is here, hurry up.”

I reached into my pants, and pulled my dick out…

Me: “What do you think? Should I go?”

Edog (my dicks name for the purposes of this post): “Absolutely. Pick your sorry ass up, and go to Share’s now.”

Me: “I don’t know, what about the slut from earlier?”

Edog: “Fuck you.. You jerked me around with her. You owe me big time.”

Me: “Fuck you! When’s the last time you took a dip in a warm pool of mucus and spilled yogurt everywhere? Oh wait let me remind you, less than 24 hours ago. I take care of you like a son.”

Edog: “I guess you’re right, but I got some good news. You’re going to fuck a model tonight with perfect tits, her vajj tastes like fresh spring water. She’s also going to suck me…”

Me: “Yea?”

Edog: “Yes.”

Me: “Ok, let me finish this beer, than we’ll go.”


Crazy Georgia pt. 5


Me: “You are the best, stand up.”

Her: (Still sucking)

Me: “Stand up!”

Her: (Sucking more passionately)

To myself: “She’s not hearing shit. She’s in her zone.. I hate to kill your shit bro, but I needa bust a nut.”

I pulled my cock out of her suction cup grip, and lifted her drunk ass over the sink. After shoving my cock into her under her mini skirt, I heard an echo in the hall.

Limp wrist boyfriend: BABE??

One pump, two pump…

Me: (under my breathe) “This fag.”

Her: (under her breathe) “Go, please.”

Limp wrist boyfriend: “BABE!!!!?” 

I wrapped my arm around her mouth, and pulled her into a stall with my cock still in her special place.. We were thrust up between two walls in a stall half naked, silent and still.

I could see through the cracks in the stall, he poked his head in the bathroom and kept walking to the back exit. Two minutes later he passed the bathroom again, while dialing her phone..

Me: (whispering) “Silence your phone.”

Her: (whispering) “It’s in my purse.”

Me: (whispering) “Where’s that?”

Her: (whispering) “In the bar.”

Me:(whispering) “Fuck… Go out there, and pretend to be retarded drunk or something. I don’t know,  I’m outta here.”

Her: (whispering) “Kaay.”

Me: (whispering) “Ok, bye..”

I rolled out back to my place through the back exit, which was conveniently located two minutes down the road. I changed my shoes, and tossed the piss soaked ones over my balcony; changed my jeans, and cracked a beer. I was going to have to lay low for a little bit…


Crazy Georgia pt. 4


She turned around and glanced at me up and down. At that very second I knew it was on like Donkey Kong. I was going to use her as a colostomy bag for my jizz. 

I looked her deep in the eyes, and pulled her in for a punch drunk passionate kiss. She was loaded as fuck, but she was also following her own animalistic instincts (which were telling her to manually empty all bodily fluids from my body).

I shoved her into the bathroom down the hall, which was flooded in piss. She got on her knees in a piss puddle, unbuckled me and started going to work. The smell of human excretion was penetrating, however this girl really was really enjoying herself. I was drunk and sucky sucky wasn’t doing it for me, I was itching to bend her over the sink and hit that raw, but I asked myself “what would Jesus do?”

Jesus would allow her to continue showing off her god given talent, so I stood there idle while finishing my smoke.


Crazy Georgia pt. 3


Six brews later:

I was buzzed, and Foreign Teacher A’s true colors were showing. The Hungarian asshole didn’t contribute to the garbage “FTA” (we’re going to refer to him as that from now on) and the other vajj starved cuckolds were spitting. I knew he wouldn’t, however these fags caused a disturbance in my happy buzz. I lost my patience…

Me: “#1: Rape culture in the west is a myth, here’s why….. #2 The Syrian refugees aren’t inherently good, here’s why… #3 Third wave feminism isn’t about equality, here’s why…. #4 A Trump Presidency could be beneficial for the west, here’s why… #5 Racism and sexism is a figment of your imagination, here’s why… ”

Limp wrist cucks & FTA: “Yes, and….”

I couldn’t get angry with them; When I looked at them, I just saw a bunch of babies painting the walls around them with their own shit.  I say this because that’s how I view these individuals; misguided children who’ve allowed themselves to be manipulated into believing toxic ideologies.

I really wanted to just help them, but it wasn’t the right time or place.

Couple more pints later: As I started to disengage from this whole thing, the hot girlfriend of one of the Limp wrist cucks invited me outside for a smoke.

Me: “Do you want a smoke?”

Hot chick with limp wrist boyfriend: “Yea, come outside.”

I followed her out the back entrance, I was feeling a great buzz and I had a clue what was to come.