Let’s go for a run!


We’re going to go for a five mile run. Make sure your shoes are tied properly, take a couple deep breaths, and brace yourself. I’m not going to go easy on you. Ready? Three, two, RUN!!!

Our starting pace isn’t fast nor slow, approximately 8.5 minutes/mile. 25 minutes – 26 minutes/ 5 kilometers is a time our doctors will respect.

Although a five mile run is a warm up to a marathon runner, 99% of the North American population find this to be difficult. After all, it is a steady forty to forty five minutes of moving your legs.

Your first mile is a breeze. Your breathing pattern is still stable; brush ya shoulder off holmes.

Surprisingly there’s no one else running outside. It’s a beautiful day, and these suburbs are dense. They probably have elliptical machines/ treadmills at home, or are at the gym.

You’re starting to adjust your breathing to your steps. As you start breathing heavier and heavier, blood flow is being redirected to your muscles in action. At two miles in, you’re tired as fuck; your preference would be to stop now! Your body says you’re starting to use valuable resources while your first cramp kicks in.

The halfway mark is nearing, and the endless looking hill you’re trekking up is discouraging. Your breathing becomes very rapid, and your thighs/ legs/ everything burns like… WASP STINGS!

If a genie in a bottle appeared now and granted you one wish, your very wish would be to stop, but you can’t; you’ll black out before you stop.

As your lungs start giving out you realize it’s necessary to pull back; your pace is dropped to 11 minutes/ mile. Your legs are still moving, that’s all that matters. “Look there’s a major intersection over there, after I reach that I can think about taking a break” you tell yourself…

Hell no! You’re going to keep moving those legs until they fall off; let’s see if they fall off by the time that bus stop ahead is reached.

Your body is drained; it’s prompting pain all over as a final attempt to get you to stop. Although, you are relentless; you start mastering the ability to deceive your body with your mind. If only your body discovers that you’ll finish, it’ll handicap you with even more cramps and discomfort.

Ah, the essence of being at one with yourself; encapsulated by plain suburban air as cars swerve by. The sidewalks are covered by blades of cut grass and sticks/ twigs from yesterday’s storm. The landscape is desolate, isolated; your view is that of people in moving pods, in a rush to go nowhere important. Look at the bright side; this is better than running next to someone who stinks of Bo or unpleasant perfume at the gym.

Woo! Those two minutes of 11 minutes/ mile made a huge difference; you feel like you can manage this all day.

Here we go, back to 8.5 minutes/mile. You’re gaining momentum, and nearing the four mile milestone; no words of encouragement, no one holding your hand. You are your own support, and encouragement.


It’s way too hard, it hurts too much; you drop back down to a pace of 11 minutes/ mile. Your arms get weak, and start to dangle by your sides to conserve energy maybe. Your eyes start to widen as you spot the end though; a big red stop sign that you started at over half an hour ago.

Your mind signals to the rest of your body that the end is near, and your legs move faster than you’ve ever seen them move in your whole life! Your body, that fucker, could have moved like this earlier since that major intersection.

Who knew, your body can lie to you too?!

Welcome to the big red stop sign. A few great stomps transpire to slow down; you feel your heartbeat pounding in your head, neck and chest.

Take a deep breath, and walk it off.

Congrats! You did it all by yourself, and no one held your hand. No one will ever hold your hand, not even you.


3 thoughts on “Let’s go for a run!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s